soulmate au where kise, kasamatsu, imayoshi‘s soulmark is the first sentence their soulmate says to them and it‘s something super hilarious

imagine-knb:

I’ve not done this soulmate AU before and my comedy writing skills leave something to be desired in my opinion so I really hope you like these! – Admin Jade

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Kise

Kise pumped his legs faster, praying he would make it in time. If he was late for practice one more day, Kasamatsu-senpai would kill him; or worse, he’d bench him. The station came into view, train at a standstill but the announcer’s voice indicated he’d run out of time. Only focused on his end goal, Kise burst forward in a mad dash, reaching the door just as it was closing. He jumped, wedging himself between the sliding panels, but couldn’t quite get a foothold to push all the way in. The wall of the tunnel was getting closer and just as he figured he’d lose more than his position on the court for one game, he was tugged roughly into the car, landing in a sprawled mess upon the floor his chest rising and falling rapidly.

“You know, you’re just adding to the belief that blondes are dumb,” a voice said from above him.

As Kise opened his eyes, he felt a tingling sensation on his arm.

“No! Of all times and all things to have been said, why now? Why that?” Timidly, he looked at his wrist, groaning as the very words just spoken to him etched their way upon his skin. He turned his attention back to the car, only to realize he had no idea who’d spoken to him. Much as he hated the words, he wanted his soulmate but how could he find them? He couldn’t just blurt out, “Who saved me?” He didn’t think the phenomena worked like that. Worrying his bottom lip, he stood indecisive, eyes flicking all about the car looking for any connection, but everyone kept their attention fixed on their phone screens, out the window or on books and newspapers.

Sighing, he thumped his head against the wall.

When he arrived at his stop, he filed out with the rest of the passengers, discouraged he’d probably never find his soulmate again when the person ahead of him dropped their book, unware of its absence. Rushing forward, Kise picked it up before it was trampled, calling out, “Excuse me, you dropped this!”

You turned, opening your mouth to thank him but froze, jaw unhinged as you felt a light burning on the arm extended towards the blonde you’d managed to save from losing his leg. He planted the book in your hand, confusion on his face at your expression until he noticed your arm.

Eyes brightening to an alarming degree, he exclaimed, “Soulmate-cchi! I found you after all!”

Kasamatsu

“What’s the point of going on a date if they’re not my soulmate, huh? It’s just a waste of time!” Kasamatsu snapped.

But Kise was being even more obstinate than usual. “You’ll never meet them if you don’t get out there and try! I have mine, Kasamatsu-senpai, and they’re wonderful!”

There was no lie in that, you had been a rather amazing addition to the ace’s life. Kasamatsu appreciated your no nonsense attitude and that you kept the golden boy in line better than even he could. “I’m still surprised you didn’t end up more hurt, maybe Midorima is right about all the mystical crap.”

“No changing the subject, senpai! Just go! If anything it will give you practice for when you do finally meet your destined one.”

Destined one? Was that really how it worked?

And so Kasamatsu found himself agreeing, more so just to get Kise to shut up about it than anything else. He considered not going. He didn’t want to be there anyway and what did he care that someone Kise knew was offended? But his sense of propriety won out in the end and he found himself making way to a park to meet this mystery person.

It was going to be a disaster, he just knew it.

Approaching the fountain agreed to as the simplest meeting spot, Kasamatsu spotted you, your own eyes searching for him. When you locked gazes he felt his throat tighten up; you were gorgeous.

He didn’t know how he kept walking but eventually he was standing just in front of you, however your expression was not one of recognition. Had Kise not told you what he looked like? Not provided enough details? The blonde could be a bit scattered brained from time to time, but surely even he would realize-

“Is there something you wanted, or are you just going to stand there gaping like a fish?”

Startled out of his thoughts, Kasamatsu barely recognized the fact you were speaking to him when he felt pressure on his inner wrist up to his elbow. Looking down, he almost fainted; you were his soulmate?

Flustered even more, he blurted out, “You’re my soulmate!”

Your eyes widened as his words appeared slowly on your arm. Looking to it and then his, you couldn’t stop a chuckle, then a full blown laugh from escaping your lips. The male before you scowled, unclear at the reason of your amusement but when you took his hand, his heart nearly stopped.

“I’m sorry for the…less than desirable ink you have there. How about I make it up to you by paying for dinner while we get to know each other?”

Imayoshi

Imayoshi was tired, it had been a long day of wrangling Aomine to practice, talking Sakurai down from whatever ledge he’d placed himself on this time and trying to keep Wakamatsu from killing both of them. He sat upon the gym floor, relishing in the momentary quiet as the team took care of washing up and changing back into their street clothes. He’d found it advantageous to wait until they’d all gone before taking his own shower, where he could be alone with his thoughts and planning their training and drills.

Boisterous chatter, mostly arguments from Too’s most temperamental members, signified his opportunity to retreat.

Later, he made his way to the bus stop, muscles protesting each step.

Taking a seat on the newly arrived bus, he sighed out to no one, “I swear on my soul, if those guys don’t get their act together I’ll kill them.”

From across the aisle he heard, “Do you even have a soul?”

Head whipping to the side, his eyes landed on your face, the mischievous smirk he found there intriguing. You looked a little familiar, clearly a fellow student at Too, unless you were just in the habit of blurting out insults to random strangers. Just as he was about to reply, he felt a tapping on his arm and looked down, watching as the very words just spoken to him bled into existence on his skin.

Lips curling into a devious smirk, his narrowed eyes looked once more at your face, now a bit paler and with no sign of your previous cheekiness to be found. Leaning forward, he whispered, “Property of Imayoshi Soichi.”

You gasped, frantically rubbing your arm as if that would magically erase your soulmate’s words. Suddenly he was beside you, eyes opening just enough to reveal his irises which burned with wicked amusement. “Now, I think, would be a good time to get to know one another, don’t you?”